It Helps To Know You're A Giraffe

from the desk of Ron Sukenick

Actor Richard Gere understands one important principle of NetBeing: Before you can understand others, you must first understand yourself. While driving to an appointment the other day, I heard on the radio a report about Gere, who was annoyed at what he perceived to be unfair media coverage about him. The veteran performer summed up his opinions in three very terse but telling statements:

I know who I am.
No one else knows who I am.
If I'm a giraffe, and the press says I'm a snake, I'm still a giraffe.

Dr. Robert Rohm (you remember that I studied under him to become a Certified Human Behavior Consultant™) teaches that better relationships come from our becoming more aware. Awareness, in turn, begins with the person we deal with most - ourself!

In my earlier blog, "Going Beyond Networking - In Style!" I explained that, using the DISC behavior model, we can notice four basic behavior patterns people tend to use. Two of those are more outgoing styles, with one being more people-oriented, the second more task-oriented. The remaining two patterns are more reserved, again with one being more people-oriented, the second more task-oriented. Of course, we're a bit more complicated than that, and we don't always follow our basic behavior pattern. But we typically use one style as our "fall-back" mode, our way of reacting that feels most comfortable. The idea behind all of this is that, as you become familiar with the different styles, you can use the model as a tool for communicating with other people in language that makes them most comfortable and most open to developing a relationship with you.

Richard Gere was annoyed because he was feeling misunderstood by the media. Feeling understood and accepted for who we really are is a basic human yearning, and celebrities are no exception. At the same time, I like the self-awareness Gere shows in his remarks. I spend a lot of time helping people go Beyond Networking to connection and then to relationship, but the process really begins with being able to say what Gere said: "I know who I am."